The Graduate

Long before we accomplish that deepest desire or wildest dream we talk a lot about how it will feel when we actually get there. We have a "My Name in Lights" moment and then we bounce back into reality and remember the effort that must be put forth in order to attain that dream. Some of us wander, others climb, and there are even those who have a straight shot. As for me, I was a wanderer. My dreams took effort, lots of it and at 18 years old, I wasn't so sure if I was up to the challenge.

Two weeks into my freshman year and I can still remember the overwhelming feeling of panic. I had signed up for whatever-classes-were-left and had somehow made my way into a program called CAL (The Center for the Advancement of Leadership- this program is discussed more in section Learning Leadership). I found myself completely overwhelmed and consumed with the pressures and expectations that surrounded me as a new college student. There was no way I was going to be able to do all of this. I wasn't smart enough, I wasn't capable enough, I didn't know how to live on my own, I didn't know how to manage my time, and I definitely wasn't a leader. 

My parents lived thirty minutes away and I knew they would take me back. If I was so incapable, they would surely get me out of this mess right? I called my dad and told him I was dropping out and coming home. What he told me that night has shaped the rest of my life and I will never forget it. He said:

"What kind of life will you make for yourself if you just come back? You can't give up."

Next to my wedding day, graduating with my bachelors degree was one of the most memorable days of my life. I could still hear my father's words as I walked across the stage to receive my diploma. I had done it. I had completed my bachelors degree. With the support of my parents, and the incredible experiences that began my freshman year, I developed a passion for higher education. With this passion, I have dedicated myself to becoming a life long learner. 

My family at my 2013 graduation!

Leadership Statement

Leadership is not about me. It's about working together to bring about a greater good. Leadership emulates the very core principles of moral courage and expresses competencies in collaboration, communication, advocacy, and professionalism. Leadership is dedicated to the inclusion and development of diversity and to establishing and unifying the goals and mission of the institution with the needs of its students.  Leadership is about being a hands-on educator, rolling-up our sleeves, and getting down in the dirt right alongside our colleagues, followers, and friends. It's about influencing and genuinely connecting with others, helping each person become a better version of themselves.

Learning Leadership

Presidential Leadership Students of The Center for the Advancement of Leadership 2009-2011

As a freshman, I received a housing scholarship through a Presidential Leadership Program called the Center for the Advancement of Leadership (CAL). They offered me a two year housing stipend in exchange for my participation in their 10-step leadership certification process. I could choose from several mastermind seminars, leadership conferences, service projects, and courses with titles like "organizational behavior" and "seven habits of highly effective people". This program gave me the opportunity to really dive into learning. I was exposed to different opinions, cultures, backgrounds, and life styles. I could not get enough. I was like a sponge, absorbing everything that came my way. I began to pull from other's learning styles and leadership examples and began building the potential that I had always dreamed of. 

From the CAL, I began to realize that leadership is exactly as Seth Godin states; embracing the failure of your followers because it will lead to their growth (Godin, 2013). I was one of those followers and I had the potential for growth because the leaders of CAL were dedicated to developing my leadership. Their mission was to prepare students with the leadership knowledge and skills necessary to be competitive in the world market and to make significant contributions to society (Leadership, 2015).

I can be that contribution. I even feel it inside when I'm a part of a project or working with a team member. I know I have the capabilities to reach out and help someone else discover their potential. Not only did I realize I could have an impact on the people and places I had been, but I had the potential to continue to grow and develop greater leadership competencies and abilities. I was excited and completely unstoppable. I wanted to dive into life and into college, the one thing that several months earlier I almost give up on.   

Because of Godin's encouragement to be more innovative, to be generous, and authentic regardless of impending obstacles or potential weaknesses, I believed that taking risks was my greatest ally. I chose to take chances that year, to give of myself in the most unlikely places, and to ignore the constant beat of my nervous heart. I was honest and sincere, I was hardworking and determined. As the CAL allowed me to fail and flourish they provided an environment where I was able to develop and become a better version of myself. 

Living Leadership

Utah Valley University Student Association 2010-2011

My experiences in the CAL helped me create relationships with many on-campus faculty, clubs, organizations, and departments. I looked for opportunities to serve and stand as an advocate for underrepresented students as well as participate in campus-wide service projects and student rights campaigns. Over the next several years, I was exposed to a plethora of leadership styles and I began to identify which leadership characteristics I wanted to acquire and which ones I did not. 

Dinar, Rhett, and Alex of International Student Association

One of the main themes identified through my own observations and experiences was the importance of virtue-based leadership. When we look at leadership through a virtue-based theory we see leaders by their character. Individuals who lead with virtue demonstrate courage, generosity, self-control, honesty, and fairness (Northouse, 2013). They develop unity within a group despite difference of opinion and encourage action in order to facilitate growth in their followers.

Alumni Leadership Team Members and speaker Tom Krieglstein.

At first, as I held more and more leadership positions, I judged and accused others of being too autocratic and inhibiting the growth of not just a few of their followers but everyone associated with their vision. While developing closer relationships with my colleagues, I realized that many individuals followed a similar course of leadership development. Some because of failure, selfishness, or unaccountably allowed themselves to plateau and became their own Achilles heel. They allowed their discouragement or personal gain to distract from their original purpose and oath to serve the students, to advocate for those under their jurisdiction. And from there, they made every meeting, every event, and every task unbearable for their followers. 

Utah Valley Student Association 2011-2012

What I took from these observations was a fierce determination to lead with self-awareness. To be a morally good human being and to believe that others can learn to be virtue-based; that it is not only available if previously a part of their disposition, but can be taught and acquired. I desire to be a leader of practice, from the beginning until the end. To act each day in accordance to my beliefs so that these beliefs literally become a part of my identity (Northouse, 2013). With this identity I hope to encourage what Frankena (1973) and Pojman (1995) believe that"by telling the truth, people become truthful; by giving to the poor, people become benevolent; by being fair to others, people become just".

ULA Conference with Utah Valley University Student Association

Becoming Leadership

UVUSA Club Ambassador Team Members

I titled this post Becoming Leadership because after four years filled with student advocacy campaigns, administration push-back, power struggles, professor limitations, sexism, and discrimination, I have grown to understand that the triumphs and challenges that I have faced provide me with the desire to reach out and be a guiding light for others.

As a psychology major, I also learned how to recognize behaviors that inhibit a student and I feel more capable of helping others who struggle internally. I can directly affect the life of another if I utilize the skills acquired during times of defeat. I have realized that every choice I make affects the direction I go and my ability to influence another.

Case ASAP Conference with the UVU Student Alumni Board

I want to be a transformational leader. One that engages others and creates a connection that is lasting and dependable. I want to raise the level of motivation and moral in myself and my followers through the actions I take and the person I strive to be. Some of my most memorable leadership experiences came after I was praised for who I was DURING a project instead what was actually accomplished or not accomplished. When my leaders were attentive to my motives and helped me identify positive behaviors and personality characters in morally good leaders, I couldn't help but want to emulate them (Northouse, 2013).

My mentor Kevin Walkenhorst and teammate Kimberly Carlisle

My desire has been to serve and to help and to guide. I want to utilize my skills and abilities to influence the lives of others and help them create a ripple effect. I watched as my efforts as a student leader helped others see their strengths and encouraged them to step forward to help someone else find the same realization. What I didn't expect was to be changed myself. 

I could do hard things and I knew it. I felt like I was given this gift of realization with the capacity to move forward and do extraordinary things. My desire to influence others caught fire and my self confidence increased. Not only did I want to help others but I felt like I had the capability and the responsibility to reach out and be a positive role model (Northouse, 2013). 

As a transformational leader, founded in moral courage and authenticity, I will focus on developing my followers and helping them reach their truest potential (Northouse, 2013). With each triumph and every obstacle they overcome, I hope to provide an opportunity where they will see that these experiences can help them become a better version of themselves. 

Role Model: Carl Hanson

Carl Hanson is  an associate professor of health science and is currently serving as the director of the master of public health program in the Department of Health Science at Brigham Young University. I had the privilege of working with Carl as I managed the office and coordinated volunteers for a nonprofit health clinic is Provo, UT.

Carl has influenced my leadership style in many ways. As I got to know him, I instantly appreciated his friendly and welcoming demeanor. Overtime, I began to more closely watch his interactions with his colleagues and student volunteers and I was pleased at the person that began to unfold.

Carl is always the first person to show up and the last person to leave. His genuineness is central to the development of his relationships and his potential to connect with others. He has a strong and sincere desire to influence his followers in a positive manner and he works tirelessly to set the stage for this relationship development and emotional involvement. He humbly works to fulfill his duty to uplift and encourage each individual he comes in contact with (Northouse, 2013; Wheeler, 2012).

As a charismatic leader, one of the main qualities that Carl possesses is his strong sense of moral values. His truest desire is to be a role model for the values and beliefs he wants his followers to internalize. He works to provide support and awakens motives in his followers that enable their confidence to increase and their unyielding affection toward him and their teammates to heighten (Northouse, 2013).

Carl has attained what Rushworth Kidder's Institute of Global Ethics describes as moral integrity: "the courage needed to live a moral and ethical life" (Wheeler, 2012). He has learned through trial and error what type of an individual he wants his followers to see him as. Within himself, he is committed to utilize his moral courage to make decisions, even if there are external pressures and negative consequences that follow.

I respect Carl for his dedication to moral standards. I believe that if I can exemplify this type of leadership then I will be able to facilitate the growth and development that can create stronger and more courageous followers.

Role Model: Erin Gruwell

"When you ask people about what it is like being part of a great team, what is most striking is the meaningfulness of the experience. People talk about being part of something larger than themselves, of being connected, of being generative. It become quite clear that, for many, their experiences as part of truly great teams stand out as singular periods of life lived to the fullest. Some spend the rest of their lives looking for ways to recapture that spirit (Senge, 1990)."

Erin Gruwell captured that spirit and influenced the most unlikely group of students. You may recognize her story from the 2007 film, Freedom Writers, which tells the story of a young teacher who inspires her class of at-risk youth to believe in themselves and pursue a life of purpose and fulfillment. 

She currently works as a Distinguished Teacher in Residence at California State University. Erin Gruwell empowers her students to reach for their potential despite the impending obstacles that lie in their way. She started the Freedom Writers Foundation which focuses on training and developing professional educators. Through her unique approach to professional development, many individuals gain useful strategies for dealing with all kinds of students, and most importantly, relearning what it is like to be a student. 

She has expressed her passion for being a teacher and for the power that teachers hold in each and every classroom they lead. She stresses the importance of connecting with the needs of the students and utilizing emotional healing to help students move forward during the harsh realities of life. Emotional healing is insuring that the leader creates an environment conducive to pursuing the hopes and dreams of their followers (Wheeler, 2012). This means that leaders dedicate their work to fulfilling follower expectations and teaching coping skills when expectations are not met.  

Erin Gruwell spoke at Utah Valley University two different times while I was a student leader. She spoke about the struggles of young students and the importance of accepting people for who they are, not what you think they should be. In her speech, she captured the audience and influenced each audience member to be a change agent in the lives of others.  

As she spoke about acceptance and trust, I could not write in my notebook quick enough. I took a copious amount of notes that day and have looked back on her words many times. Nearing the end of her speech in 2011, as she spoke of her life's purpose, she said the following statement: 

"I am a teacher born and bred, and I believe in the advocacy of teachers. It's a calling and I want my students to feel impassioned and empowered." 

I know that this is what Senge (1990) means when he says that people's team experiences stand out as singular periods of life lived to the very fullest. These experiences provide many people with the most meaningful purposes of life. Erin believes it is the leader's responsibility to act as a catalyst for the spirit of change and to create an environment where each person feels important. She aligns her teaching philosophy with facilitating emotional healing, and invigorating those who capture the spirit to move forward and create that experience for someone else (Wheeler, 2012). 

She has such passion and determination. I could literally feel her enthusiasm through the tone and description of each obstacle and triumph she had fought through. I respect her unfailing resilience and ability to see people for who they truly are. It is this kind of sight that enables followers to reach their potential and become the best version of themselves.